So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
