sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
