Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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