Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
