A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
