Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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