my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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