also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
