so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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