omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
