you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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