you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
