Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
