Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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