bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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