Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
