Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
It all started with a game of naked twister.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
