I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
