They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
