I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
