dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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