this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
