Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize