so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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