Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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