I'm drive I can fine osifer
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
i came on her dog
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
