Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
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