I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
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