And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
