then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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