Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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