OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
