Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Randomize
