This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
