margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Boobs are out for the taking
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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