I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
