I need help removing her.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize