i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I love you. Go after that dick
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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