my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
