he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
