I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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