Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
