sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
