So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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