Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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