How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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