She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
