I feel great
I just peed on a car
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
