I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
