The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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