Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
