I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
